A collection of a few of my favorite Audrey quotes lately:
*Commenting on the Volunteer Firefighters who stand outside at stop lights, etc. where our parents live to collect donations*
My brother: "They should just have a hot girl stand out there, they'd collect more money."
Audrey: "No, I don't want to stand outside."
"Get your whole life out of my business!"
Audrey: "How come you let me sleep in your room last night, Mom?"
Me: "Well I didn't feel well, and I wanted to go to bed early."
Audrey: "Oh. And you wanted a friend?"
Me: "So did you have fun today?"
Audrey: "Yea, don't you remember? You were there too."
Me: "Audrey, do you want to play Whack-A-Mole?"
Audrey: "What's Whack-A-Mole?"
Me: "A game where you smack things with mallets."
Audrey: "Yes! I want to smack things!!"
"I can't hug you. I'm Elsa. I'll freeze you."
Apparently my daughter is channeling Cher Horowitz, because her new phrase is "WHAT-ever." I don't know where she got this. She started saying it a week or so ago, not often, just in response to little things she didn't want to do but had to anyway.
"Audrey, come here so I can brush your hair."
"WHAT-ever."
*Comes and stands in front of me*
"Audrey, please put away your toys, it's almost bedtime."
"WHAT-ever."
*Puts away toys*
She still does what I tell her so I let it slide the first few times but I guess I should nip this in the bud before she thinks this is an appropriate response.
She's also big on apologizing lately, which seems great right? Except she will apologize for something she did wrong but then expect an apology for being corrected.
"Mama, I'm sorry for slamming my door last night."
"Thank you for apologizing Audrey."
"Now you apologize to me for getting mad at me."
"No Audrey, I won't apologize for correcting you, but I'm not mad any more."
"Mommy, I need you to apologize. I'm going to count to 5." *counts to 5*
Sigh.
This age is great in some ways, difficult in others. As Audrey gets older and is able to do more, I don't have to wait on her hand and foot. On the other hand, with this new independence comes more defiance, more of a desire to express her willpower. Overall, I have a great kid. Sweet, usually well behaved, polite, calm. But occasionally the sass comes out, or the temper tantrums over something ridiculous. I have to remind myself to take a deep breath, be patient, and remember that this will pass. (And hopefully not come back in full force in her teenage years.)
I make it easier by reminding myself of all the times she cracks me up with the ridiculous stuff that comes out of her mouth.
Me: "What are you doing?"
Audrey: "Nothing."
Me: "I was talking to the dog."
Audrey: "Oh. Well, she can't talk."
Audrey: "I don't like going to sleep."
Me: "Why?"
Audrey: "Cause I just wanna be crazy."
Her aunt: "Audrey you have to eat your dinner so your grow up to be strong and healthy."
Audrey: "Are you going to grow up to be strong and healthy?"
Aunt: "Well I'm pretty much done growing."
Audrey: "So why do you still eat food?"
Audrey: "Do you love me?"
Me: "Of course."
Audrey: "Well if you love me, I get to sleep in your room."
(She's always trying to weasel her way into sleeping in my room)
*Very excited*
Audrey: "Guess what Uncle James! Jack* pooped his pants today at preschool!! I smelled it. Do you like poop things?"
*changed the kids name just in case ...
This silly little girl cracks me up on a daily basis. Some of the gems that have come out of this child's mouth lately:
Me: Audrey, what would you like for lunch tomorrow?
Audrey: Um, Lobster.
Me: Audrey, what kind of vegetables do you want for dinner?
Audrey: Chocolate!
Me: Chocolate isn't a vegetable.
Audrey: Well put chocolate ON my vegetables!
(Upon seeing me lint rolling my pants)
Audrey: Did Max rub his hanging part on you?
(Max is our overweight cat. Upon further questioning, I discovered by 'hanging part' she meant his belly.)
(Walking past the wine store - apparently my kid thinks I'm a lush)
Audrey: Do you want some wine, Mom?
(Right before bed)
Audrey: Mom, did I have dessert?
Me: Yes, we had cherries, remember?
Audrey: Ok, just making sure.
Her new favorite phrase whenever she's told to stop doing something is "I can do whatever I want to do." It's fresh, so I have to stifle my laughter and put on my serious face when she busts out that one, but inside I'm chuckling at my little smart ass.
I bought the Q&A a Day for Kids book recently, and asking those questions produces some fun quotes too. We do the day's question each evening before bed and Audrey really looks forward to it - she's started running in my room and grabbing the book and a pen herself.
