Bits of Our Weekend

This weekend was a relatively quiet one. After the expense of last weekend, and our planned trip to the Poconos for the 4th of July, I thought a quiet weekend was in order. On Saturday, we packed a little picnic and headed over to Pier 62 - part of Hudson River Park.

 

 

There's a great carousel that overlooks the water - The Hudson River Animals carousel. It's kind of hidden. To be honest, I didn't even know it was there till last summer. Rides are only $2 and the accompanying parent rides free. We did a couple rides on various animals and then headed over to the little field and set up our picnic.

Nothing exciting - a couple cookies, a couple clementines and bottles of water.

 

Later on we went to our favorite park and Audrey played in the water for a while.

 


Get in Mah Bellyyyy

We also walked by a pop up Farmer's Market in our neighborhood, so I bought a loaf of sourdough and some veggies and made this amazing sandwich for dinner - Avocado, tomato, cucumber, arugula, bell pepper, salt and olive oil.

On Sunday, Audrey spent the afternoon with her father. I used the time to run some errands, watch a couple episodes of Game of Thrones (I'm newly obsessed) and lay in the little field on the pier and read, well, Game of Thrones (I did say obsessed...).

The weekend was relaxing, but Audrey had fun and we spent plenty of time outside. We head to the Poconos Wednesday evening to spend a few days at my parents' house for 4th of July.

I'm a Special Snowflake, ya'll

Home Sweet Home, the view from Brooklyn.

I don't really feel like I'm special. There are many, many people/mothers who have it harder than I do, or a more interesting life. I just think I can offer a unique perspective, compared to a lot of other blogs I have read. I'm a mom in Manhattan - but I'm a young, single mom. I had my daughter when I was 23. I don't have the help of a spouse. I didn't wait to have a child till I was 40, established in my career with the Manahattan equivalent of the big house with a white picket fence. I don't make a lot of money. I don't even make six figures. (Which, everywhere else, is quite a lot, but in Manhattan, is still considered "scraping by").

So how the hell do I live in this expensive, crazy, gorgeous city? Well, luck, to be honest, first and foremost. I am in a beautiful neighborhood of Manhattan by the grace of rent stabilization. What is rent stabilization? Rent stabilization applies to apartment buildings with six or more units, built before 1974. If an apartment is rent stabilized, the government caps how much rent can be raised, generally resulting in below market rents. There are other factors involved - when income gets pretty up there, the rules change, there are ways to take a building out of rent stabilization, etc. I won't go into those. There are also rules regarding renewing leases. I won't go into details, but generally, you have to be a pretty big asshole to not be offered a lease renewal in a rent stabilized apartment.

Isn't she a beauty?

How exactly does one find a low cost rent stabilized apartment? That's where the luck comes in. You basically have to know someone. Or know someone who knows someone. My aunt lived in the apartment for 20 years before passing it on to me. She ended up with the apartment because my grandparents knew the owners. I've been in the apartment for four years now. I don't plan on leaving anytime soon. My building doesn't come with any "extras" - no laundry room, no elevator, no doorman. We don't even have a buzzer. I have to walk up & down three flights to see who it is when someone rings the bell. My apartment is big enough though. Some of the kitchen was updated when I moved in. We have lots of windows and my bedroom overlooks a park. Plus, we are zoned for a great elementary school.

Don't be fooled though. My rent is still expensive. Childcare is expensive. Heat & hot water are included in my rent, so utilities aren't usually bad. I budget carefully and make it work. I don't wear expensive clothes, we don't eat out often, we don't take many vacations and the ones we do take often involve staying with family. Of course I'd love to make more, but I have time on my side. I know I'll continue to work towards my goals, but in the meantime, I'm perfectly fine with our life, and I'd love to show that it's possible to live a good life here without making half a million dollars a year.

Silly Girl

This silly little girl cracks me up on a daily basis. Some of the gems that have come out of this child's mouth lately:

Me: Audrey, what would you like for lunch tomorrow?
Audrey: Um, Lobster.

Me: Audrey, what kind of vegetables do you want for dinner?
Audrey: Chocolate!
Me: Chocolate isn't a vegetable.
Audrey: Well put chocolate ON my vegetables!

(Upon seeing me lint rolling my pants)
Audrey: Did Max rub his hanging part on you?
(Max is our overweight cat. Upon further questioning, I discovered by 'hanging part' she meant his belly.)

(Walking past the wine store - apparently my kid thinks I'm a lush)
Audrey: Do you want some wine, Mom?

(Right before bed)
Audrey: Mom, did I have dessert?
Me: Yes, we had cherries, remember?
Audrey: Ok, just making sure.

Her new favorite phrase whenever she's told to stop doing something is "I can do whatever I want to do." It's fresh, so I have to stifle my laughter and put on my serious face when she busts out that one, but inside I'm chuckling at my little smart ass.

I bought the Q&A a Day for Kids book recently, and asking those questions produces some fun quotes too. We do the day's question each evening before bed and Audrey really looks forward to it - she's started running in my room and grabbing the book and a pen herself.

On Figuring It Out

 

The view from my boss's office. Sadly, not my view.
I'm not one of the Important people around here. Yet.

It. Capital I. As in, what do I want to do with my life?

I was ambivalent on this topic even pre-child, so factoring in another little person's needs has made it even more difficult to figure out the next steps. I have worked in admin at a law firm for about three and a half years now. At first, I thought there was no room to grow from my current position, but I lucked out and started working for someone Important (again, capital I on purpose - the powers that be will tell everyone here they're important, but some are a little more important than others). Let's call him Grumpy Cat, for privacy's sake. Working with the prestigious Grumpy Cat of the legal world results in constantly being in contact with other Important people, stretching the boundaries of my job description, and taking on special projects. I think with the right networking, and some advanced education, I could go somewhere with this. Business Development type stuff, possibly. But is that what I want to do?

I started college at NYU undeclared, planning to pursue Journalism. After one boring class on the technical side of Journalism, I switched to English. I figured I could go in many different directions from there - teaching, law, get an MBA - and it would be a good base. After I graduated, I did a Paralegal certificate program - partially to stall making a decision on the next step, partially to determine if the law really interested me, but mostly to be able to defer those crippling student loans - more on that in a future post.

My daughter was born right as I was finishing the certificate, and three months later I started at my current job. I thought a law firm would be the best way to determine once and for all if law school was in the cards for me. Spoiler Alert: Nope. There are many reasons behind me coming to this decision. I can't add to my already ridiculous student loan debt, nor can I take off work for three years to pursue the degree. And frankly, I don't want to. Big Law is not for me - the politics, the insane hours, the obnoxious clients who feel every question is a matter of life or death. In my adventures at Family Court (again, more on that in a future post) I spoke to my own lawyer a bit about going into family law, and learned the market is just as oversaturated as Big Law, and first year associates in small firms generally make less than I do now. With the responsibility of another person to care for, not to mention those evil student loans, I can't afford that pay cut.

I have always wanted to write. I wrote stories a lot as a kid. There was one particularly ridiculous one I remember - kind of a copy cat attempt of one of those Sweet Valley High books. Something about a girl being trapped in a resort overnight. Um hello, ten year self. Resorts don't close. I have also always read constantly. I still make time to read as often as realistically possible - on the train, when I take a lunch break, after mini-me has gone to bed. Reading as much as possible is the first step in becoming a great writer, right? Well I've got that down. The next step is pushing myself to actually do the writing. Maybe I should take up Ernest Hemingway on his advice to "Write Drunk, Edit Sober" and dive in.

In the meantime, I keep pondering the back up plan - what do I do if I don't become the next Great American Novelist? Time will tell.

Bits of Our Weekend

I usually try to keep our weekend outings on the inexpensive side. There's so much to do in New York that you don't need to spend a fortune to enjoy it. However, this weekend I treated Audrey to a trip to Victorian Gardens at Wollman Rink in Central Park. Victorian Gardens is a small amusement park geared towards younger kids. Most of the rides have a height minimum of 36 inches to ride alone. Audrey is slightly above this but still not into riding alone, so I had to buy my own unlimited ride wrist band. Admission plus an unlimited rides wrist band is $24 each. After snacks and water bottles, it was a somewhat costly outing, but Audrey had a blast, so it was worth it. The swings were her favorite ride, we did that one three times. The Hot Air Balloon ride came in at a close second.



Photo from Victoriangardensnyc.com

 

 

Photo from Victoriangardensnyc.com

 

The "silly faces selfie" was Audrey's idea ...


After Victorian Gardens, we headed over to nearby Heckscher Playground. It's a huge playground, with a big sand pit, a splash pad area, and a couple swing sets. The sand pit is surrounded by several pyramid-like structures. Kids can scale the side or go into a tunnel and climb up a ladder in the middle, and then slide down into the sand. Audrey had a blast climbing up and down the ladder, pretending it was a castle.

 

 

 

 

Finally, we finished the day with some ice cream. Audrey chose a Hello Kitty shaped pop (I'm sure full of sugar and other not so good stuff, so fortunately she only ate about half of it). I treated myself to a Frozen Yogurt with sprinkles, which of course Audrey snuck a couple bites of.

We kept Sunday low key - some errands and cleaning, followed by a trip to the local park, the playground at Chelsea Waterside Park. We spotted this awesome graffiti on the way:

 

 

The park we went to has a splash pad with some pretty neat fountains - they look like something froma  Dr. Seuss book. So Audrey wore a bathing suit and played in the water and the sand for a bit. We forgot to bring sand toys, but we had an empty plastic cup from stopping to get a drink. It's amazing the things kids can amuse themselves with. She filled the cup with water and dumped it various places. She added sand and told me she was making a smoothie. I forgot what it's like to be so easily amused!

 

 

On Sunday evening, I made a pot of this Tomato Basil Soup (Recipe Here). I like to do make ahead meals when possible, especially in the summer. I don't want to have to be in the kitchen all evening when I get home from work during week, particularly when it's 90 degrees outside. This recipe made a big enough pot of soup that it'll last for several meals - with a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner or with a salad for lunch. Audrey did her own "cooking" while I made the soup - consisting of a bowl, a spoon and various pretend ingredients. She even narrated what she was doing out loud, so it was like her own little cooking show.

 



Overall, a great weekend with my sweet little girl!

Introductory Post

There are a lot of "NYC Mommy Blogs" out there, but I think most of them make it look like an unattainable lifestyle - stay at home mom, unlimited income, etc. I haven't seen a blog from a single mom in NYC's point of view (and if there is one, I'd love to read it!). I'd love to share how living in NYC with a child works for people who don't have the luxury of a large income, being able to stay home or even a spouse to help. I'd like to share a little bit of my life - our day to day routine, our little adventures around the city - including my experience with finding kid friendly, inexpensive things to do, how I make it work and other bits and pieces.